There is just something so promising and magical when my husband says he’ll watch the littles for a bit so I can have some time to myself. I mean, time to myself is rare, extremely welcoming and I will literally take every minute I can squeeze out of it.

But sometimes that magical, hopeful moment full of promise and peace gets crushed into a pile of tears, doubts, questions, messes, and buckets of disappointment before it even begins.

You know what I’m talking about:

Someone throws up or has an accident and your “me time” turns into scrubbing the carpet, washing sheets, cursing the juice, considering ripping out the carpet, more scrubbing, and then feeling guilty for even thinking about “me time” all while trying to keep the child out of the mess they just created.

Or the little one won’t just succumb and take a freaking nap during your long-anticipated “me time” so you’re busy holding, rocking, googling sleep help, crying, swaying, feeding, googling “why won’t they freaking sleep?”, wondering if you’ll ever sleep again, and then feeling guilty for being upset with the situation and your desire for “me time” in the first place.

And that dreaded phone call at the end of an extremely long, defeating day that destroys your ability to “run” when your other half comes into sight and results in a crying mess of a very stressed, worn out, over-this-day mom.

“Me time” as a mom doesn’t usually equate to actual “me time.”

Me Time

Now, as a mom of two little girls 20 months apart, “me time” is typically taking a warm shower (often times interrupted by questions and cold air), running errands or going to the grocery store ALONE, tutoring for a few hours, cleaning the house, paying bills, working on our family calendar while erasing my 2yr olds famous circle drawings, and picking up the never-ending piles of toys.

The problem is that these aren’t actually “me time” activities, they’re more like “mom-time to-do’s with frequent interruptions so that you never actually finish them”. Yea I think that’s a better name, because honestly a shower is not “me time”, it’s just a necessity that doesn’t happen as often as it used to or should.

So I decided to reach out to some fellow mama’s to see what their “me time” looks like. And if you’re a mom, you won’t be shocked by these answers.

  • “My only “alone time” is when I sneak upstairs to use the bathroom and play on my phone for an extra 15 minutes. LOL”
  • “No mommy time, but my alone time involves craft stores. Lots and lots of craft stores.”
  • “What’s this “me time” you speak of?”
  • “Coffee. Hot coffee. In peace.”
  • “Baths! Bubble baths are my favorite mom time – but I sure do love my target runs!”
  • “I typically find myself watching or at least listening to whatever weird show was on last… by the time I realize it’s still on I’ve lost a good chunk of that oh so precious “me time”.
  • “Quietly scarfing down junk food!!”
  • “I love the 5 minutes sitting in the car queue at the kiss and drop when I pick up my kids from school!”

Target

Ahhhhhhh…mom life. Isn’t it thrilling?!

It’s funny how normal activities like bathing, shopping, drinking coffee and using the bathroom suddenly become so valued that they qualify as a “me time” activity once you’re a mom. I never considered bathing and using the bathroom as a “me time” activity, because well, it’s not. But now that I am a mom, things have changed and when you go for days without showering I guess it just naturally turns into a luxury which ends up falling into the “me time” activity list.

But…

There are occasions where I get actual time to myself, not to shower or clean or juggle other crap that I don’t really want to do. But actual moments in time that I get to do something I WANT to do. This is in part due to my husband, my family, & Komae (my Village). Anytime I need anything, I have this amazing support system ready and willing to help me get that me time. I also carve out time once a month to enjoy a moms only subscription box (yes, it is literally just for you!). Check it out!

 

Hi, I’m Kristin, a blogger over at This Wife & Mommy Life when I’m not chasing after two beautiful, high-energy little girls. I write about the humorous and challenging trials of motherhood, marriage and life as those are the moments that become my favorite memories. I created my blog to connect with other parents and spouses and help them through the tough moments that we all experience. Connect with me on Instagram: @KMA0815

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